It's a shame Manchester United aren't sponsored by Sharp anymore.Seeing Wayne Rooney running around with it on his chest would be the epitome of irony.
Police: How did your wife get that mark on her forehead?Husband: She fell down the stairs.Police: But you live in a bungalow.Husband: Yeah but she lives in the cellar.
My wife asked me to pick her up after work last night.Apparently, me driving by her office slowly and asking her "How much for a blowie?" was not what she meant.
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